Secret Adulterer

Some people's sins are shown more easily than others. Some people don't care while others want to portray themselves as the good girl or the good guy or the one who is quiet or who is really nice. Whatever the characteristic it may be there are only a few people who know the real them and even then they probably only know parts of who they are. Everyone is pretty much familiar with whatever comes to the dark comes to the light. Well some people's mess or secret are never exposed but I will exposed mine.

As a new creature in Christ I still struggled with a lot of things from my past like most of us do. We love Christ and this new found freedom but often times we fail to live out that freedom because we willingly chain ourselves back to our sin and that what I did. I was the lady of the night in so many different ways. Although it wasn't necessarily sex, I still watched explicit content (porn, movies that were highly sexual), listened to explicit music, read books that contain explicit content, over ate what I wanted, lied about school, and was just overall lazy. I was a secretly adulterous woman.


Now before you go judging my life and what I use to do I want to express to you why God laid this on my heart; to expose the enemy. Satan will always tell you not to say that in front of your "Christian" friends or not to go to any religious authority for help because of embarrassment or pride but in order to be free we must expose the enemy while using discernment. Anyways...


While I was reading Hosea, it truly broke my heart. (Take the time to read it. It one of those small books of the bible and won't take time at all) God really wrecked me and caused me to look at my life and how I treated my husband Christ. I was submitting myself to other things before and share my intimate relationship with other things and people before Him.

Christ longs for us and often times portrays that of Hosea when we go out into the world and get caught up in the wrong crowd or the wrong things. Though we are married to Christ, as followers of Christ, when we seek other things for fulfillment or put other people before Christ and His standards we are like that of an adulterous person giving away of ourselves what belongs to God.


I continued to read Hosea of how God's chosen people were so wicked and had turned so far away from Him that He called them not His people. God was so upset that He even said He will show them no more mercy. Whew! I don't know about you but that shook me to my core!!

We can get so deep into desires that are not from God and we forget who we are don't share the characteristics of Christ but the characteristics of the world. Although we may be going to church on Sunday, reading the word, going to that place of intimacy in worship, we are still missing the key factor which is an intimate relationship solely with God and uninterrupted by people, things that do not glorify Him.

But like Hosea, God is a forgiving and loving God. His love for us in unconditional and even when we do a 180 away from Him, He will still be there with His hand outstretched to take us back in.

I pray that you come to know the error of your ways like I did and that you feel such an urgency and that the passage of Hosea burdens your heart and that God revels to you what you have been putting before Him. 


Peace, Love, and Blessings!

Soliciting for Free

When God gave me this title for my next blog, I was taken aback. A lot of people look down on hookers, prostitutes and strippers  but what they fail to look at is the men and women who are freely giving their bodies to others who did not pay the price for them.

The definition of a prostitute is a person who willingly uses his or her talent or ability in a base and unworthy way, usually for money. This definition caught my attention because the latter of the sentence says “usually for money” which means that services are not always given for money.

Ladies and Gents, we must realize that prostitution is not limited to giving your body in return for money. We call out those who make a profession out of it cheap and worthless but we are giving ourselves away willingly and freely.

In parts of the world there are many who do not have a choice but to sell themselves but here we call it “I own my body” or “I choose who I have sex with” or “It’s just sex”.

No!

You are soliciting yourself for free and marketing your brand for nothing but a 5 minute thrill. Sex has never been just sex. It is an intimate form of relation between a man and a woman that is reserved strictly for marriage and when sex is introduced outside of marriage it causes a WHOLE bunch of problems.

In 1 Corinthians 6 Paul writes to the church of Corinth and warns them to “shun immorality and sexual looseness” (verse 18) but it is verses 19 and 20 that are the most powerful and makes verse 18 stick.

“Do you not know that your body is the temple (the very sanctuary) of the Holy Spirit Who lives within you, Whom you have received [as a Gift] from God? You are not your own,You were bought with a price [purchased with a preciousness and paid for, made His own]. So then, honor God and bring glory to Him in your body.” ~ 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

We are not our own beloved. When you decide that you love this person think of your Father. You were purchased for a price that he/she did not pay for and that price is marriage. That is the price for you in which the person comes into convent before God and says that they promise to uphold you to God’s standards, he/she promises to do everything within them to bring you closer to Christ and not away from Christ, they promise to love you with the love of Christ and cover you in prayer and intercede on your behalf.

Don’t you want that? Yes!

Don’t you deserve that? Yes!

It doesn’t matter what you’ve done because Christ has redeemed us all and gives us a fresh start.

When sex was created it was never “just sex”. Yes it is enjoyable but only within the perimeters of marriage. Sex is created to bind the husband to the wife and the wife to the husband and to create godly offspring. This world has perverted God’s creation of sex into just something you do because it feels good and its fun. There are countless books, websites, magazines, and stores that will show you how to please your man or woman but what do you need any of that for? When you’re married you shouldn't need all the extra stuff to help you, you better pray about it and ask the Holy Spirit how to please your husband or wife.

God placed this on my heart because are so many that look at sex as just sex when it’s not. I was one of those who did not know the value in my virginity and thought of sex and just an act when you’re ready and that there is such a thing a safe sex. (News Flash: THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS SAFE SEX OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE)  Yes I knew your virginity was a gift but I did not fully understand the why.

If you've made that decision as I did, it is never too late to stop. You can always recommit yourself to Christ and say NO MORE to that carnal nature. That is a lie of the enemy that you can’t stop. Yes you can and by the blood of Jesus you will.

For those who have not yet made that decision, don’t. There are so many others who are in the fight with you and haven’t crossed that line. It will be so worth it when you go to the alter and stand before God and know that no one else will have had you but your spouse. (This is not the time for you to feel condemned for those who have already given yourself away read Romans 8:1)

I pray that you receive freedom in this post whether you are struggling with masturbation, pornography, homosexuality, or sexual impurity. I plea the blood of Jesus over you and that a seed of life has been planted in your bosom and that your mind will begin to change because the seed has fallen on good ground.

You are God's workmanship. (Ephesians 2:10) Begin to walk in that. 

Peace and Blessings to you!

The Forgotten

I'm going to tell you a story about a young girl who loved to do many different things. She loved to sing, loved to dance, and  loved to be actively involved in things. Then she grew up and as she grew up people started to pick on her because she was different. Not only was she different in her appearance but she was also different in her lifestyle. She began to listen to those people who called her "too big" and "ugly" and "weird". She lost who she was within each harsh word. Then the ignoring began. She was never picked to be on the teams. Nor was she asked to go to birthday parties and things of that sort. Everyone knew her as the good, sweet girl but no one really knew her. Yes, she had friends but no one really seemed to understand or stay for the long run. Those who understood would abandon her and she'd feel alone once again. Those who came into her inner circle would take advantage of her kindness and use it against her. This young girl grew up to become a young woman who came to know and love the Lord but she carried some of the hurts from her past.

That young girl was me...

You see I haven't always had a low self esteem problem. I was young and wanted to do many things but I was never apart of the crowd that I thought I wanted to be a part of. I wanted people to see that I was just as good as everyone else. I was always crying out for someone to notice that I was hear and that I was just as awesome as the other kid. Did I have family support? Yes, but somehow in my mind I thought "that's what they are suppose to do". 

I've always felt forgotten or overlooked in my lifetime. No matter how loudly I spoke, I wasn't heard. No matter how much I loved, I wasn't loved back. No matter how or what I gave, I wasn't given anything back. I was incomplete and always felt alone and abandoned. Although that was my life Pre-Christ, sometimes I still struggle with that.

It came to my attention the other day that I was a social butterfly. I was like what? Me? (I'm horrible at accepting complements. I don't know how to just say thank you most times but anyways...) I thought for a moment and began to compare myself and say I don't measure up because x,y,z. Why was I thinking that? I am a new creature in Christ! I am royalty yet, I fail to take complements without saying "I could be.." or "I honestly wish...". I say those things because I often feel overlooked or forgotten by those who claim to care so much or those who I care so much about.

But then I remembered that I'm not on this earth for people to know me and know who I am and what I'm about. I'm here to live my life for God and so that HE can be famous.

Many things raced through my mind earlier as I thought about why those thoughts come to mind. Why do I often think that no one cares and that I'm alone in this thing? Why do I feel like no one likes me? It's because I haven't fully let God fill me up and complete me. It's also because of fear. Afraid to be vulnerable with others who can potentially hurt me because they, like me, are only human. Even though Christ is in my heart and I rep Him to the fullest (okay maybe that's a little prideful lol)  but there are still areas that I'm just like "well God I don't qualify" or "you sure you want me to do it" or  "God I just got saved I'm not ready yet" ALL THESE EXCUSES!!! I had forgotten that I am chosen. I had forgotten that I am a royal priesthood. So what if I mess up?! So what if I'm not "strong" in that area. God's strength is made perfect in my weakness! I had missed that whole point of God and that was He takes the unqualified to do mighty things! Moses and David are perfect examples! God shaped and molded them. They didn't come out the womb all made up. God had to shape and form them with experience.

So I am humble myself and say God use me. No matter how uncomfortable it makes me.

I say all this to say that you are not forgotten my sister, my brother. I speak life into those places that you deem dead. God has a plan for you. You don't have to be perfect. Don't you ever think that you are overlooked. Man makes mistakes but God sees you! GOD SEES YOU! He knows how many hairs on you head. He knows what you're going to say before you say it. He knows what makes you laugh and cry, He knows!! He saw you when He was forming the world! He knew all that you would be and He understands you. Jesus knows. So rest and have faith. God has you!

This is my theme for the summer: I'm Walking On Water (Inspired by the link below)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BeTu8twnGvU

Divine Appointments

Hey Everyone! I have missed you guys and I apologize if this blog seems really random but I just had to you know some things.

You guys, God has really been showing out in 2013!!

It amazes me how when you decide to let God be the ruler over you life, how He can take little ole you and do mighty things with your talents. God has strategically placed me in the life of everyone who I encounter and surround myself with.

It is no accident that I became a part of the lives of so many wonderful women of God through Pinky Promise, Westminister Fellowship, The Gathering, Exposure, PULSE, and Bound4Life. All the people that I have encountered and built relationships with in 2012 was no accident. God was preparing me for 2013!

2012 was a bunch of ups and downs for me. I kept going around in circles, failing the same old tests. Finally in September I said, "Okay God. I'm yours."

But what if I missed that call? What if I decided  that it would have been too hard to change and that I might as well continue living a godless life because compared to other people I was doing okay. I had my little boy friend, my sorority sisters, this guy on the side, a car, and I'm in school (not doing well, but in school nevertheless). I needed God! No matter how much you may try to convince me, my life was messed up and it is no coincidence that I was saved when I was.

Tonight I had the pleasure of attending Celebrate Y.O.U. with Abby Johnson, a Pro Life ministry  This was a Pro Life event sponsored by PULSE (another Pro Life ministry). Another I knew the facts about how many babies fall victim to this legal murder in the U.S. from writing a paper on it last semester, my heart was broken once again and I asked God, "What do you want me to do?" I'm so thankful that He burdened my heart because I can no longer sit by and be silent about abortion. I am saying NO MORE SILENCE!! 

I could have been anywhere else tonight but God saw to it that I was there at that event tonight for such a wonderful cause.

I know it sounds like I'm rambling, but God placed it on my heart to share with you this.

Where ever you are in your life, its never too late for you to turn to God. Stop running from Him. He knows you and He's the only one who can make you a better you. Stop being selfish and slowing up God's plans. He requires  more of you and divine appointments are waiting for YOU!

How much longer will you live your life for you and let someone else waste their life like yours because you didn't get yourself together. God wants you! He wants  to use you and your testimony!

Divine appointments are miracles. What are missing out on by not running to Christ?

Deliverance: A Little Bit About Me

Hello Blogging World! God is so good to give me the chance to reach people through blogging! This is my second blog attempt and I am so glad that the spirit has lead me to do this again. I had wanted to start this blog before the end of December and even while I was a home in Birmingham (205!) before the new year but everything that could happen, happened. The computer wasn't working right, I couldn't find my old blog to transfer things, and I had a hard time coming up with a name for the blog. Needless to say, it was God's way of saying it wasn't time yet. Thankfully I just heard Him say today, Blog! So here I am.

So let's dive right in. I was asked about my testimony and I though wow. Not a lot of people know how I came to Christ or what brought me to Him. I'll start from the end and work my way to the beginning. Recently I joined my church Gulf Coast Christian Center. I had heard God tell me to join for a while but I was a little hesitant because I am not sure how long I will be in Mobile since I am here for school. But a few Sundays ago, God tugged at my heart to join. I love my church family! So many children, teens, young adults, and adults on FIRE for God and diligently doing His will. 

This past weekend we had a shut in where we fasted all day Saturday. This was not my first fast (a blog I will have to do separately about my FIRST fast) but this fast was different. We were preparing for the new year! We had a lesson on deliverance. I had never heard anything about it before and it was my first time hearing about it but I it wasn't by chance that I was there learning about it. After hearing the lesson I needed to be delivered from demons that had planted themselves inside of me from generation curses to things that came in by opening those spiritual doors. We had a group deliverance session but nothing broke inside of me. I wanted to let go of everything that was not of God but it was just something that wouldn't break. After this we had the opportunity to break a brick with a sledge hammer. The objective was to visualize what it that we wanted to break inside of us. For me, the brick  represented the wall that was hindering me from being delivered from the demons that were inside of me. That was only the begin. Then we had the opportunity to write down some things that we needed to break inside of us on a clay pot and we were able to break it with hammer as well. Not only were we able to break somethings but we were also able to bury the remains of brick and clay. Although some things were broken inside of me, I still needed more.

I will never forget December 31, 2012 because it is my Spiritual Birthday!! On that day any demon that had it hold on me no longer lives inside of me. The devil fought so hard but he DID NOT win! I came to my deliverance session with my list of things inside of me that did not belong. The session brought about me answering questions that were uncomfortable and learning about this inside of me that I never knew were there. When I tell you I felt so free, man FREEDOM!!!  I knew I couldn't go into the new year harboring those demons inside of me.

Inside of me was the spirit of hurt, lying, religion, lust, harlotry, homosexuality, masturbation, pornography, murder, schizophrenia/split personality, loneliness, suicide, self-hatred, molestation, unforgiveness....and maybe some other things that I can't remember of think of but man I was messed up! I needed to receive salvation all over again because I questioned if I was going to heaven. All the years of feeling like I wasn't good enough and that I was worthless. The scares of me being a cutter and wanting to end my life were still there. I can remember hating that I was so different and I wanted to badly to fit in and hated myself for taller, bigger, whatever else compared to everyone else. You see the devil had my mind and I went into a vicious cycle of wanting to be accepted. You see even when I lost my virginity it was because I fell for the "well everyone is doing it". Countless times in my life I fell for the lies of the devil and that day during the deliverance session the Holy Spirit tore everything down in me and laid down the foundation that I was missing. The devil even told during my deliverance session that he wanted me back. But you see he couldn't have me! I was not longer his slave, no longer living for him!!!! I was God and I had invited Him into my heart and now I know! I know where I am going when I die. I know who I serve and who my life belongs to. I know where Jesus is and He is in my heart!

Someone asked me how long have I been saved. I answered since March 2012 but honestly, I felt saved all over again! So how long have I been saved? December 31, 2012 before the new year!!!

I pray that you don't look at this blog that she is just crazy talking about demons but this is real! There are things inside of that which don't belong and we must speak and tell it to GO! Has the devil tried to attack my mind since then? Yes! But he can never have me back, I belong to God!

I'm going to put a link here of my first blog where I talked about my testimony but this my permanent blog site!

http://pearloftransparency.blog.com/2012/05/22/being-transparent-my-life-begins/

Peace, Love, Blessings! Make Sure You Leave A Comment!!


Amber Roquelle